Sunday, 8 December 2013

"Sorry I Can't Hear You"

So over the last week I have had a cold (as I have previously whinged about). However, as the week progressed, I have steadily lost my voice more and more, and found it hard to breath every time I had to utter more than a few words.

Needless to say my colleagues and other half took the piss tremendously. Every time I had to speak to them they would mock me with those wonderful words; "speak up, I can't hear you" and other taunts to that effect. Things got worse though, and eventually and I couldn't talk beyond a very strained whisper. It was exhausting, and in the end I left work and came home as sick because it was exhausting and causing me quite a bit of chest pain. The tight chest was getting worse every time I tried to speak, I was getting out of breath and dizzy. Nightmare.

Off I went to the pharmacy; can you give me anything for this, I think I have a chest infection. "No" came the answer, "you need to get yourself to the walk in health centre". The perfect thing to hear on a Saturday.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, I went to the walk in centre (accompanied by the best person for these situations, my mum) and after an hour and half wait, got told I have laryngitis. An instant ban on talking was applied. I need to rest my vocal chords.

And the reason for the short breath? Well, it was more than likely that I was stressing myself out from not being able to talk, and having to work so hard to be able to talk. But because I was working myself up, I was making myself get tight. Something I'm good at. Whenever I've had problems with my body, the area around it seizes up. Pain in my knee; ended up on crutches because all the muscles around it went solid. Pain in my shoulder; end up unable to move shoulder and with neck ache too because the muscles went solid. Pain in my foot; end up unable to walk on it because the muscles has seized badly.

The seizing up of muscles is apparently related to how poor I am at managing my pain and managing my condition. I guess it's understandable. Lesson is learned each time, and conveniently forgotten when the next acute pain occurs. Fun and games.

Thursday, 5 December 2013

Winter is Coming

I can feel it in my bones. Winter is upon us. I know I sound like an old women, but my body really does seem to think it's 90 at the moment.

I've developed a cold (and I've not had a full on ridiculously bad cold for years!) and it is exhausting me. My ribs hurt from coughing and sneezing. My legs and back and body generally ache. I'm rather tired of it.

But we mustn't whinge. Part of the reason I am feeling so terrible is because I've not been making the effort to maintain my exercise routine. I've not been to the gym for about 3 weeks, and I've been pushing my body too hard in the jobs that I do at work. I should know better, but I think I've gotten stubborn again lately.

It's easy to step back and go "right, I need to do this, this and this, and I'll be feeling better" but the reality isn't always that easy unfortunately. I need to get a motivational system in place so that I can get better at maintaining my health.

I will get this figured out. Hell, I have no choice. It'll be 2 years this coming January since I got diagnosed. I feel like I should know better by now; much better.